Goodluck Jonathan, the face of the Nigerian tragedy

It seems that I must get into it and I shall because no one seems to be talking about it. Or rather everyone's talking about it, but no one's talking about it like this. This blog post is about the Chibok girls, but I must warn you, I'm not going to write a tirade about how the Nigerian government is ineffective, and about how the vast majority of our figure heads are seemingly without a clue or a care about the vast majority of the people that live here. If they had a clue or a care, they would not have gone three weeks without saying a word about the missing girls. The day the news broke, we would have been on the receiving end of a presidential address covered by everyone about how we need to band together in these hard times, and about how everything was being done to retrieve the girls.

It's no news that Goodluck Jonathan plans to run for president in the 2015 elections. I watch his advert about 5 times a night on Channels television (Channels is a pretty darn good Nigerian television station). The advert goes something like this. 

Through out history, change has never been easy.

Martin Luther King did it.

Nelson Mandela did it.

Lee Kwan Yew did it. 

And now Goodluck Jonathan is doing it.

Support his transformation of Nigeria in 2015.

Vote Goodluck Jonathan for president. 

It's a pretty good advert. It's smooth and the image quality is good and it's short and concise. It's even been compared to a few of Obama's presidential campaigns. The only problem with it is the timing. Let me show you what I mean by this. 

Enter Channels at 10 O'clock on any night this week

News Anchor: There's still no word on the whereabouts of the 276 school girls...

Advert: Jonathan is doing it.

News Anchor: Another bomb's gone off in Nyanya.

Advert: Jonathan is doing it. 

News Anchor: Nigerian politicians are asking for help from everyone.

Advert: Jonathan is doing it. 

News Anchor: There is God Oh.

Advert: Jonathan is doing it. 

News Anchor: Boko Haram are responsible for over 2000 deaths in 2014.

Advert: Jonathan is doing it. 

News Anchor: PWC have been hired to audit the NNPC accounts after the ex CBN governor Sanusi Lamido blew the whistle on the missing $20 billion.

Advert: Jonathan is doing it. 

News Anchor: Abubakar Shekau has promised to sell the girls because Allah told him to do it. 

Advert: Jonathan is doing it.

...

And that is how President Jonathan has become the face and cause of every Nigerian tragedy on the news cycle. He needs to get a clue, or hire people who have a clue fast, because at the moment, he's more than a little bit of an embarrassment.

Happy Days,
Afam