There comes a time in the life of every blogger (by every blogger I mean me), when he must write about something that he may not have written about otherwise. This is one of those times. Now this one isn't for blatant profiteering. It's for something a lot more valuable: the bonds of the friendship contract. This particular contract allows for the sharing of favours.

I send Obi a lot of my material before it sees the light of day and he gives his feedback at all hours of the day. Obi in turn demands that I send him all invitations and press passes that find their way into my inbox.

This one is about Ferona. Ferona's a couturier that's recently opened up shop in Lagos. Their shop's on Karimu Kotun in Victoria Island.

According to their website, they are renowned for relevant couture that offers versatility, function, and wearability.

 A handy thing if you ask me, a dress that only lives for a day is a waste of money. I'm an expert in the versatility of clothes. You can ask my 3 pairs of jeans, 15 shirts and four pairs of shoes about this. I'm sure they'll agree

The clothes look like this.
And have this sort of vibe



If I were ever in need of a dress I would probably look there.

This is a thing that could actually happen. There's nothing I won't do for a good costume party. I don't think my costume leanings will ever transition to a full blown lifestyle change but who knows? All I can say at this point is that I quite enjoy manliness and the fact that walking in high heeled shoes isn't a skill that I ever forsee being required of me.

Every piece they make is created using traditional haute couture embroidery techniques and extraordinary age old couture secrets. I don't know what those are, but they certainly do sound impressive. If my tailor ever said those words to me, my eyes would become starry, and I'll squeal like a pig while my wallet weeps tears of blood and sings, "You will never ever ever... Get out of debt."

What can I say, it's what happens when Champagne sensibilities meet Cider realities.

Happy Days,
Afam

I know! Believe me I know! Fashion week was a lifetime ago, so I shouldn't be talking about it now, but these designers need to be told yo!

I've recently learned that the Nigerian first language isn't English but pidjin English, so I shan't type this one in English, I shall type it out in pidjin because it's a little bit of a public service announcement.

Anytin u dey do in life, you first need to understand am wellie wellie. U na nid to kno what your neighbour is doing befo u com embarrass yourself pata pata. But eh, you kno, the kind of embarrassment you go embarrass yourself is a very special kind of embarrassment becos not every body go kno say u embarrass yourself. Like that time Wande Cole and Don Jazzy just dey cast demselves for twitter. Some pepo were team Wande and Some udder pepo were team jazzy but d pepo wey get sense knew dat dere was no winna. All na losa.

So, when som1 go to New York fashion Week to show apron, make u na no come back one month later and also show apron oh! Or when you see dat beta designer don dey release look book and pisho make u too release your own bcos if you dont it will look like say u don copy welly welly. At least if prada coms out yesterday and ur own comes out today everybodi go say dat imbe trend even if u see am and dob am shap shap. I kno say not every1 fit be superior dobberman like dat so make una try do am in one week if na dob u dey dob, but if u no dob, y u go wait tree monts b4 u sho ur own. Is it smat?

Also make u na no wetin everybodi in history don do b4 u come and say na 4 naija u don first make d little black dress. Pepo in Naija go just dey hail u, but when international journalist come and see as u don talk am, dem just go dey lafff pass goat and sheep and winches and wizad. Dey no go feature u 4 magazine oh. Make u no wetin inspire u as u dey design wetin u dey design bcos beta designer are writing dissertation oh! See as I don talk am finish. A word is enough for d... wais.

Happi Deis,
Afam

The first day of Lagos Fashion and Design week is over. It really is. As I type this it's 1 minute past midnight and that means that we're quite firmly in the second day of Lagos Fashion Week 2013. It was fairly interesting. I observed the bulk of it from my position at the foot of the runway. I stood for about 5 hours without pause. Yes, it hurt, but fashion isn't meant to be painless. Before the show began I did my rounds on the green carpet.

This guy's Bayo Oke-Lawal. He's the creative Director and head designer of Orange Culture. He might also be its only designer, but I didn't ask him that. It seemed like quite a rude question to ask at the time. I didn't ask him what he was wearing either. Well, I asked him about the jacket, but that's because it's a really cool jacket. It reminds me of a pair of overalls or a painters smock. I want! I want! I'll ask him for it tomorrow. Who knows? I might get lucky. I do think he should have buttoned his shirt up though. Not all the way to the top, but just so much that it didn't feel like he was about to assault someone with his nipples. I forgot to say that he'll be showing tomorrow. And by tomorrow I mean today, day two of Lagos fashion and design week.

This lady is Eunice Efole. Everyone made a big deal about her, so I did as well. What the big deal was exactly I do not know, but for what it's worth she looked nice. She's got an awesome body hasn't she? Look at those proportions! I know a va va voom when I see one.

That's dear old Eunice again. Her dress is lovely. I quite like it. It doesn't try too hard. The workmanship on the skirt of the dress is incredible.

This is Niyi. He's one of my newest friends, and that's because we made friends at the same time as the picture was being taken. He carries a murse. He puts his Ipad in it. He's awesome because he laughed along with me, when I laughed at the fact that anywa you look at it, he's carrying a man purse. It's quite a nice purse. I like what he wore. It's chilled without being to chilled. He proves that you don't have to wear sweats all the time to show how chilled you are.

This is Mai Atafo. He's a designer. He'll be showing on the second day of Lagos Fashion Week 2013 as well. I really like his suit, but the red lining throws me off a little. It reminds me of Mammy's red taffeta petticoat in Gone With the Wind. Do you remember the one? It was so stiff that we could hear it whenever she moved. Rumour has it that his collection is going to be extremely androgynous and gender bending.

This is Nkiru Anumudu. I'm loving the pineapple accessories. I do not believe that anyone else could pull her outfit off, and that's to be commended. Her shoes are to die for as well. I imagine that thousands of women would kill for them.

Orire Omatsola and Bayo. Orire is the owner and head designer of Re-Bahia. She's showing tomorrow as well. I had the hugest crush on her when I was in Uni but nothing came of it. She had a boyfriend and my emotions were fickle.

Toyin Jolapamo. She's the woman behind the blog, the Soho sister. I know the picture isn't a very good one, but a bad picture is better than no picture at all. She's incredibly cool. We get on. Which is a little weird, as I've only known her for 6 hours tops. She's got much better pictures on her blog: http://www.thesohosister.com/

 Happy Days,
Afam

PS. These pictures belong to me Afam Odi. You may use them but please include my details and blog link.

I like baseball caps. I would say more about what it is about baseball caps that I like, but that's going in a post for my buddies at alpha rings (they'll soon be Australia's biggest men's lifestyle and fashion blog. Believe it!!). But never fear, you'll get to read it soon enough. I'll stick it on the facebook page, when it goes up (https://www.facebook.com/theramblingsofamadmanafam).

I like baseball caps so much that I went out and got one. This one's a nice one. I've christened it the Afam cap because it's got a massive A on it.

The bulk of you must think that all there is to blogging, is sitting in front of a word processor all day, hammering out words and coming up with crazy ideas for future content. While a lot of that is true, the blogger must also look the part.

How fetch is that?

You'll never see me and think, "what a normal guy". Sometimes that's a good thing, and sometimes it's a bad thing, but most of the time, it's just a thing.

These are Finlay and Co wooden frames. The moment I come into some money, I'll be getting me a pair. I think you should too.

Beginnings will be the death of me. I know exactly what I want to write but I'm just looking at the page. I think I delete more than I actually write, but I've only got ten minutes for this one so ALL SYSTEMS GO!!

There are some things that we grow so accustomed to that we fail to see what it is about them that is odd. I realise that the phrasing of that sentence is a little strange. It might be comfortable for you to read it as there are some things that we grow so accustomed to that we fail to see what is odd about them. I cannot tell you which of the sentences I prefer. They both feel like my children and I refuse to choose between them for while the first one isn't very good looking it has such character, and while the second is very pretty indeed, it is also mind numbingly dull.

A couple of hours after I posted my interview of Lakin, the fetishist (I mean that in the best way possible. He isn't a sexual deviant as far as I know, it's just that Lakin has "things" for so many things. As I know of no synonym for thing but fetish, fetishist it is) he asked me what my next post would be about, and I said, "who knows?" Because I almost never know what the next one is. It's a little bit like life I suppose. I can't tell you what will happen in an hour but I do hope desperately that my dissertation learns to write and edit itself. That would be lovely wouldn't it?

That's a shirt/blouse from Celine and it is exceedingly cool and not at all mind boggling. You need not stretch your imagination to think of how you could possibly wear such. It's either a too large shirt or a cross between a shirt and a tunic. It is hardly extraordinary. You could do so much worse. You have probably done so much worse.

That's from J.W Anderson's 2013 Autumn/Winter collection. I'm probably not going to be wearing this any time soon.  I'm not saying that there's anything wrong with it. If you want to rip the clothes off the model, more power to you. Do your thang. Be your own man, or woman.

I wrote about them here: http://www.theramblingsofamadman-afam.com/2013/01/meggings.html and I think they're offensive. If you've clicked on the link and read what I had to say about meggings not too long ago, then you are a star. You are a gem among gems, and I will hold you dear forever. I really haven't got anything more to add, except that they are obscene.

That is a printed Kaftan. Without the model it really doesn't look that feminine at all, which is a good thing. You want to be looking like a prince, not a princess. While it's perfectly acceptable to want to look like a princess, if you do you shouldn't take any advice from me because you won't end up looking like a princess. I like things like this and that's probably because I'm African. It looks comfortable and easy to wear. The only disadvantage is that it's completely made out of polyester, and I'm not the biggest fan of polyester. Why wear polyester when there's cotton? If you fancy it, pick it up here

This on the other hand looks incredibly feminine on the model. But it is still tunicy and Africany so I love it anyway. It's made out of cotton, but the embellishments are polyester. I liked it so much that I bought it. Yes, I bought it. As I'll be moving back to Nigeria soon, where the temperatures hover around the late 20s and early thirties all year round, this is the easiest breeziest item of clothing I'm likely to find. If it were any breezier, I would be naked, and we can't have that can we? My naked form would seduce you, because I am a sexy beast. I didn't come up with that. Believe me! Read my about page. If you quite like it, then you might as well buy it. It's about time that you started being good to you. Buy it here

Talent is something so rare and intangible that when seen it must be appreciated. It reaches out to us and shows us the fibre underneath the fluff. In my short career as a blogger, I have seen several pictures; hundreds and thousands of them, but not many of them have stood out to me. Hardly any of them have made me think, "Who took this?" This is partly because of the medium itself and partly because we live in a world where every Tom, Dick, Harry, Sally and Methuselah has a camera and photoshop.

Lakin Ogunbanwo is a 25 year old fashion photographer who lives and works in Nigeria. The fact that he is a fashion photographer in itself is a little bit strange as he is the holder of two degrees in law. The first is a BA in International Law and Diplomacy from Babcock University and the second is an LLB in Law from the University of Buckingham. He is part of the Nigerian artistic uprising for Nigerian parents are notorious for their condescension of any field that does not guarantee a 9 to 5pm work day with ample opportunities for promotion and job security.

I am sorry my famzers, I have failed you. If you are new then you're probably wondering who a famzer is as it is not yet a word in the English English dictionary. If it were a word in the American English dictionary I would not be surprised at all. Famzer is the name I lovingly bestow on all readers of the blog. I say tonnes more about it here. Now where was I? I really must put more effort into staying on topic, but it is quite possible that you enjoy it when I digress. I am sorry my famzers, I have been terrible. I have not gone online window shopping and told you what it is that you should be buying and wearing since September. I assume that you have all gone about naked.

I'll have you know that I, Afam am uniquely qualified to go online window shopping on your behalf. On Tuesday I was featured on the GQ Style Hunt. I went through the trouble of taking a screenshot of it for your viewing pleasure. In my opinion this is the only qualification I'll ever need.

So you know that fashion blog you've been reading? Stop. He isn't as stylish as me. Even though I don't blog about clothes very often, quality is always better than quantity.

After seeing the pictures, you must all be unbelievably desperate to hear how this truly spectacular, lavish and extravagant outfit came about. Yes, your heart is pounding very heavily indeed, boom ba da boom ba da boom. If I do not tell you might spontaneously combust from anxiety. As I do not want you to go up in a pillar of flame, for if you did you would be unable to read the blog, and I can't have that, I'll put you out of your collective misery.

White is such an easy colour, one can never have too many white things. However this doesn't apply to underwear. When I was in boarding school Papa Afam used to buy me white underwear from Marks and Spencer.

 I love Marks and Spencer for trunks, hipsters and boxers. They're all so very comfortable.

As you can imagine I hated this. I went to a boarding school in Abuja for the greater part of my teenage years, where the only things vaguely resembling a washing machine were my tiny hands and my ingenuity with mixing detergents and bleaches. My white boxers were the bane of my life. And if God Forbid you did a shart, you were finished. I swear to you, the time I spent maintaining their whiteness was worth more than the damn things. Boxers should always be black. Black hides a multitude of sins and as such is the pinnacle of efficiency. 

Anyway, that's a white long sleeved t-shirt from H & M in a medium. I got one two sizes larger than me because I like the way it hangs on me.

The trousers are a drop crotch carrot leg pair from All Saints. They are thirty inches at the waist at the waist and this is a shame because I'm only 28 inches. As a result of this truly unfortunate difference, I spend the greater proportion of my time in them hoisting them up. It is exhausting. Why doesn't he wear a belt you ask? Well, I refuse to wear a belt with them because when I do all the extra fabric gathers at my crotch. It makes it look like I've stuffed a baby down there!! On that day I fastened the trousers to my boxers with some safety pins. Genius!!

I chose a pair of Reiss leather slippers for my feet and a red snap back for my head. I'm really keen on snap backs at the moment. There are so many different ways that they could be worn. There's really no excuse not to own a few dozen.

I finished the look with my silver bracelet from Tiffany & Co, my 21st birthday present and a natural pearl, and precious stone bracelet I nicked off a good friend of mine.

When dressing up, it is important that you remember that one stand out item is enough to see you through. Too many stand out items and you will end up looking like a clown.

Happy Days,
Afam

It has occurred to me that I Afam, being incalculably talented am more than capable of delving into the exceedingly dandy and foppish waters of fashion blogging. You see, I was having fun on the internet when I stumbled on Lanre Aluko's blog. It really is something for I stayed enraptured for the better part of a whole day. I was so intrigued that I found myself plugging his blog almost as much as I plugged my own. The things he wears are just so comment inspiring that I could not help myself. I had the distinct pleasure of taking a photograph of him when we both attended Bez' Super Sun concert in Eko Hotel.

At the very least he commands your attention.

If you would like to see more then visit his blog where he documents the hustle of being a fashion blogger, stylist, singer, song writer and personal shopper one interesting outfit at a time. His outfits are usually so interesting that the eye never knows where to settle. It is a rather stimulating experience.

http://lanrealuko.blogspot.co.uk/

After taking a good look at his blog I had the following conversation with myself.

Enter Fam and Afam

Fam: We can do this can't we?


Afam: Of course we can. To suggest otherwise would be sacrilege. We have some questionable days but we aren't that terrible are we?

Fam: No. We clean up nicely once we set our minds to it.

Afam: And if we look horrible?

Fam: Then we look horrible. We'll go down in a blaze of glory.

Afam: If I'm to agree to it, then we must always take our pictures in the elevator or standing on the side of the road hailing imaginary taxis for the sake of standing on the side of the road hailing imaginary taxis.

Fam: I quite agree. That would give the rather favourable impression that we're extremely busy. We mustn't do it like this:
While Ripsticking during the christmas holidays in the Lagos sun, I thought it apt to wear something both practical and dare I say it fashionable! Oh you don't know what Ripsticking is? Have no fear for Afam's here! A Ripstick is a little bit like a cross between a skateboard and a bicycle. Once you push off your feet never need leave the deck because you propel yourself by wriggling your hips forward and backwards. I wore a pair of Dolce and Gabana glasses that I quite like. I like them because I do not have any choice but to like them. As I am both miopic and astigmatic, wearing glasses isn't really choice for me. Without them I would probably have walked into the back of a rubbish van by now. The t-shirt is from Ralph Lauren, and I can practically hear your question. Why was he wearing a dark t-shirt while playing in the sun in the tropics? It was for fashion god dammit! I finished off the look with a statement pair of reddish pink shorts from John Lewis and a pair of black plimsolls from Lacoste. It is incredibly obvious that my passion for fashion burns more brightly than a thousand suns put together.

Afam: Oh God! That's terrible.

Fam: It is indeed.

Afam:Yes. I'm disappointed that you even dared think it.

Fam: I'm sorry it shan't happen again.

Afam: And the outfit was so practical that it made my stomach churn.

Fam: It will be more fabulous next time, I swear it. Are we in agreement?

Afam: Yes, we stand as one.

And that was how I talked myself into becoming a fashion guy.

Happy Days,
Afam

Happy April Fools Day

A new opportunity has arisen for you louts to do some good in the world. As most of you are incredibly practical you are shockingly incapable of doing anything good without getting something tangible in return. I, Afam have gone out of my way yet again to present you with another chance to be charitable. Did you know that Malaria kills a child every 45 seconds?

Jack Wills, has been a significant partner of the charity Malaria No More UK, since 2011. They raise money through the sale of two rather stylish bracelets made in South Africa by the not for profit social enterprise Relate, a United Against Malaria partner. All profits from the sale of the bracelets go to the charity Malaria No More UK. As someone who suffers from Malaria repeatedly, I can confirm that it is a cause worthy of your coin.

(I seem to have a natural affinity for the illness. At some point in my adolescent years I would get it at least once a year, every year, without fail at the end of rainy season. It was like clockwork. When diagnosed and treated early, it isn't very serious at all. Left untreated, it very quickly morphs into a hydra like beast that is quite capable of claiming a life. It isn't a thing to be trifled with.)

It can be yours now for £5 by clicking on this sentence. Click. What harm can it do?

It can be yours for £5 now by clicking on this differently coloured line. Don't be a wimp. Click.

Happy Days,

@zephiaovia @afam20 thanks so much for your support!
— Malaria No More UK (@malarianomoreuk) March 29, 2013

150 Posts Famzers!!! Can you believe it? I certainly can't! To say that you my dear readers (my friends, frenemies and enemies) are amazing would be the understatement of the year. You have been phenomenal. You are legendary! Because you have been so good to me, reading, retweeting and liking and sharing every thing that I put up. And those of you that haven't read and retweeted and liked and shared perhaps because you don't quite like the blog have never complained to me about my unbelievable social media presence. For this, you have my undying, unwavering love and gratitude. We've come so far in such a short period of time that I am moved to tears and emotional upheaval as I write this.

To reward you for your remarkable behaviour I am going to give away 2 Bengo belts. I initially blogged about the Bengo belt here:Introducing Bengo Belts

Bengo belts are meticulously woven by women in the Guatemalan mountains. They are the best way I know of to spice up a dull pair of chinos or a plain pair of jeans. They are indispensable. You might not know this yet, but the moment you own one you will wonder how it is that you didn't get one sooner. I, Afam, am giving you the chance to win not one, but two, if you are especially lucky.

Behold the aptly named bright belt

And this one is the just as aptly named suede belt

If you do not fancy your odds, then you may skip the competition and purchase a belt here: http://bengobelts.com/product-category/belts/

To qualify you must do the following things

1. Like the facebook page: http://www.facebook.com/theramblingsofamadmanafam
2. Share the facebook page on facebook
3. Follow me on twitter: https://twitter.com/Afam20

The winner/winners will be announced on the 31st of March.

Happy Days,
Afam

Just the other day I was hanging out on facebook. Yes, this is a thing. I have come to the conclusion that facebook is like a massive market, no, Village Square that people go to for their daily doses of inter-personal contact (does that apply here? who cares?).

Yes where was I? It is so difficult to stay on topic. I was hanging out on facebook when I got an invitation to like a Bengo belts facebook page. This facebook page here: http://www.facebook.com/BengoBelts?ref=ts&fref=ts you should probably click on it. As far as pages go it's fairly decent.

The page was rather interesting so I decided to have a gander on their website. (Just a note, they might want to stick the web address higher up the page. Not everyone is as inquisitive as I and even I hate scrolling down looking for information that should be screaming at me. It annoys me.)
 

That is a Bengo belt. bengobelts.com

Bengo Belts was founded by Ben Hayward at the end of 2011. The idea attacked him quite violently while he was trudging through the mountains of Western Guatemala. As he stopped to gaze at the beautiful valley below he thought, "There is a niche in the market for bright belts!!"

Bengo belts are meticulously hand woven by Mayan women in the same place where dear Ben was violently attacked by the idea, the Mountains of Western Guatemala.

www.joblackcraze.co.uk